Today and this week

[mynewplace]

I wish I understood layouts better. I love the text style of the Novel Approach one, but I'd lie to have either this 

    or this      as the background for my page. 

However, I'm concerned that it would make my page too busy. I hate busy. 

I'm entering a period of strange tension, most likely hormonal. I can't seem to find what I want to eat, and I want everything.  I'm in a lot of pain, and stiff, despite having had incredible sex yesterday. I've got the furnace on, but my hands and feet just won't warm up. And there isn't a comfortable spot in this house - no matter where I tried to sleep last night I woke up sore and miserable. Something's wrong. I hope it goes away soon, whatever it is. 

I wish I had the money for something like eHarmony. Of course I probably wouldn't find anyone, but I'm just so sick and tired of this routine. You know, I really should just sit back and enjoy it! If I had someone I could count on to have sex with me on a regular basis, I would be happier while I'm alone. I don't think I'd worry so much about the solitary times, if I could COUNT on someone.  It's all the work and effort and constant stress of disappointment that eats away at my contentment. Nothing is ever simple, this I know with most unwavering sureity. (I've got to quit watching these British movies. snicker)  It's yet another example of how my life is slipping past me because I insist on all the characters being present before I start to live it. Fortunately one of the things I dreaded most - the idea of sex after 40 - is now not so much a fear as a welcome reality.  I was concerned that I'd lose interest, lose flexibility (which I have) and lose my physically enthusiastic reaction. Well, no fear any longer on those accounts. I must instead find some other form of energizing myself. Sex just isn't available enough to meet my needs.

The washer is finished.  Time to find more food.

Comments

[el-jefe59.livejournal.com]

I wish I had the money for something like eHarmony.

About a year or so ago I was ready to join eharmony. I spent several hours filling out the personality test only to be told, in essence, that I was incompatible. At least they didn't take my money.

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

Dear god! How horrible! And what idiots! I filled out a profile a few months ago, maybe a year ago. I remember being disappointed that there were no ways for me to express that I was overweight and unconcerned about it. I know eHarmony really isn't the right one for me, but all of the serious matching sites require money.

[el-jefe59.livejournal.com]

It seems like places like that have a low tolerance for individuality and want to sqeeze everybody into a mold.

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

That's probably true.

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

I read an interview that conducted with the founder of e-hamormy in some mag the other day. He stated that one of his "absolute" rules is that he WILL NOT match females with males that are shorter. I'm a tall woman. Most of my BFs have been my height or shorter (most have been shorter). NO problem on my part!!!! He's got a problem with that? Well, the hell with him!!!!! His hangup is not *my* hangup, if you get my meaning...

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

Yes, I do get your meaning. I think he takes too much responsibility on himself in that matching business.

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

And you know, it's been a long time since you updated. Whatever happened with your confused gay best friend? Are you still looking for a job? What's the scoop with someone you loved breaking your heart? I thought for sure we'd see that in your journal.

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

Let's see: I broke the heart of my confused gay friend. We see each other other day when I pick my brat up and he picks his adopted brats up from school...but no words..I'm staying in my current job until the summer because I want to go on another trip in August.....and as far as the guy breaking my heart...jesus christ...every day is a new twist, a saga in that sad, sordid affair... I am so full of self-loathing I cannot stand to even look at myself in the mirror anymore...the most exquisitive pain in the world in the moment is that pivotal moment when you realize the person you have pourered your whole being into doesn't give a shit about you....sooo, I walk around with a smile plastered on my face but meanwhile my heart is shattered into a thousand pieces and I feel ever increasinginly jaded....love sucks...and that is such a redundant phrase, but geez, its so accurate....

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

Damn my typos!!!

exquisitive pain in the world in the moment is that pivotal moment ...

WTF?

I meant : the most exquisitive pain in the world is that pivotal moment when you realize..blah blah blah....

I hate Sundays!

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

I understood, believe me.

Are you going to China then?

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

Yes. I love China....I wish I could there but due to having a child, I cannot, its just not feasible...damn reproduction!!!! :--)

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

Live..the missing word is "live"

Pity the company who hires me as secretary!!! I type a gazillion words a minute but make a gazillion mistakes... therefore, if you balance it out, I must type about 5 WPM.

[gymorama.livejournal.com]

Back from the dead. Glad to see you liked the icon and figured out which timing was best.

Today has been hell but it has made a difference. Email for details

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

I'm glad it made a difference honey. Makes it worth the stress.

[gymorama.livejournal.com]

I hope so after today. I've got to get some of this stress off my plate.

Good luck with the moving tomorrow.

[another-voyeur.livejournal.com]

Have you tried OKCupid?

It's sorta like eHarmony, but without all the pretension. And it's free.

I don't know how well it does with its matching algorithm, actually, but it's a fun toy.

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

Yes, I've been there. Was there for almost a year. Didn't have one single match that went beyond a brief conversation, and the OkCupid site put shitloads of spam on my computer. It was constantly working in the background, even after I logged off.

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

My vote would be to post at Craigslist. Its free, you can type what you what and however much want and the replies will go straight to your email address but the people responding will only know you as 2342343@craigslist.com, for example. You can delete your ad anytime you want also. There probably isn't a CL for your specific city in W.Va but just choose the nearest city. I posted a personalds ad at CL once and receieved over 200 replies.

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

That's interesting, I didn't know Craig'slist had a personals section. I dunno, though. I like having my picture with my profile, because it weeds out a lot of the "eww, you're ugly" responses.

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

Sorry. Its http://www.craigslist.org (not dot com)

It defaults to San Fran because that is where the founder is from, but as you can see, there are many different locations you can directly go to. CL is great, whether you are looking for a job, a sofa, a new car or a great fuck! :--) Geez, did I really just say? Yeah I did. I know I can say that to you and there will ZERO judgment on your part. That is one (of a million) fabulous things about you.

Its Monday :--( But I hope you have a great day hon!

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

A great fuck? I'm there! lol I might check it out this evening. dunno - I'm kinda in "I want a relationship" mode. I don't know where this shit comes from, I wish I could just make up my fucking mind.

[myroxylon.livejournal.com]

You can post pics at craigslist.org

example posting:

http://raleigh.craigslist.org/w4m/149347992.html


Geez, if just dawned on me that if you meet any weirdos at craigslist, I'm gonna feel bad....must think positive...must think positive....

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

Silly bird! I meet weirdos all the TIME! It's practically required when you have a profile anywhere on the intarwebs.

[adidaschica2323.livejournal.com]

eHarmony is shit. Their physical attribute questions are not fat friendly. you can basically either say you're fat and have low self esteem or high self esteem and therefore must be skinny. unless they changed it from a year ago when I siged up. I met NO ONE! in my area who was a good match and no one in any overlying areas, this is mainly due to the fact that you cannot explain a fat physique without it coming off negative. don't waste your time or money.

match.com is no better, there was that huge scandal about their employees contacting members just to keep them interested...i wouldn't trust them. ive had really good luck lately with matchdoctor and TONS of dates and exposure with BBPeopleMeet.com greta sites imo. There's LargeandLovely.com as well, which is completely free, so it has it's draw back s with people on there not being serious about finding a suitable mate and just on there for fun.

LavaLife has a voicemail system where it's completely free for the ladies, and the men have to pay (the way it should be). There's different categories; serious relationships, casual, sex, swing, etc. I haven't tried this one myself because I'm extremely shy on the phone and talk REALLY fast so people have a hard time understanding me sometimes; but I have 2 friends who've met some really great guys and had relationships.

aas far as the layout goes, HELLO!!!!!??!?!???? you could've asked me.

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

I know. But you've been busy of late, it seems. And truth be told I kinda like my current layout. I really do have a thing about background patterns. My eyes are weak, and easily aggravated.

I never had much luck with MatchDoctor, and AdultMatchDoctor has become shit. Hardly anyone local uses it any more, much to my chagrin. I've never tried BBPeopleMeet, is it free? And LargeandLovely is FREE?? Either I'm thinking of something else, or I've never tried it. I'm SO there.

I don't want ANYthing to do with a phone. So no lavalife for me.

[adidaschica2323.livejournal.com]

BBPeoplemeet is not free, for anyone. The service fee is pretty cheap. I think $29 gets you 6-8 months of service. ive never tried AdultMatchdoctor...I'm way too chickenshit for that kind of site =(

[sapphirescarlet.livejournal.com]

I don't blame you. They're too horny over there.