(no subject)

OMG. 

I have a date for lunch on March 14. 

Unfortunately, it's a date at McDonalds. 

So, since it's not steak, but hamburger

should it be not a blowjob, but perhaps just a kiss on the neck? 

Should it depend on who pays? 

YES! I know it's not a steak for ME, but for HIM, but STILL...


I'm watching "Random Hearts" with Harrison Ford. I LIKE it. Very much. So far anyway. If he bails on her at the end, or if she bails on him, I'm gonna hurt somebody!

AMC says Harrison Ford was so dissatisfied with the movie he swore he'd never work with Sidney Pollack again. He's a real ass in most of this movie. Can't seem to help it, it seems apropos to his character, but still. A real ass.

Reiteration - because the cycle continues

I am too unbalanced to offer myself to anyone. 
Too fragile, too brittle
Too easily broken. 

I feel a tether to this computer that is unhealthy. 

It holds my mind even when my eyes and body are torn away. 

I can't remember why I have these pictures. 
I mean, I know and recall my reasoning, but 
there's a different quality to it now

a fear

and an anger

that I can't quite identify.

How have the inside me and the outside me become such separate entities?
So disparate in their values while their desires remain the same? 

I've told people before, 
and it remains true
I would stop taking the pictures
If someone would lay claim to the subject. 

Right now, I need to lay claim to her
But I've forgotten how.
I need to take her back

Trouble is, 

I don't want her either.