mynewplace

Alright, I almost called it Monday. Drove Scarlett to school this morning because it was pouring rain, and actually got to work half an hour early. And she got her OWN breakfast, did a few extra chores and still had t.v. time. I found myself thinking "Maybe we oughtta do this every day." I might be right. Maybe I should consider asking Nancy if she wants me to pick up the twins too. I'll talk to her today.

I found this on [Bad username or unknown identity:  ]http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/archives/012424.html

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know about Male Psychology but Were Afraid to Ask

Crying hot chick: I don't understand why you spent half the night telling me all the reasons you can't be with me and then wanted to have sex with me anyway!
Douchebag: Uh, you were pretty... And naked.

--Houston & Allen

Blew me away because I spent the better part of that first year with Brent experiencing this very thing. Nice to have an explanation, although I know it was also because he desperately needed comfort and physical contact but still wasn't comfortable with hugs. He is SO sweet now. And still so hurting and afraid that I'm going to abandon him like everyone else has. I don't want to, and I hope that I won't. But I have my own doubts about it sometimes. I don't know how much I can endure, that remains to be seen.

It's been almost two months since I've spoken with my father or stepmother. It's starting to eat at me a little bit again, but I just think about my mother telling me that I've been enduring mental abuse from him for more years than we can count, and she would understand if I chose to cut things off. I think of the good times I've had at his home, and very few of them involved him. And even fewer were completely satisfying. I'm so confused. It would much easier if he lived closer. I'll bang my head on this desk for a while and see if it goes away. (Okay, that made me chuckle.)

I need to try yet again to request a meeting with Scarlett's teachers. I don't want her falling into more bad habits. I MUST nip this failure in the bud if it is at all possible for me to do so. siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

Four days this week, three next. The four day weeks tend to drag, but I have several things to keep me busy and more doctor appointments than I can count. I actually get to meet Brent's father and that side of the family this weekend, they're having Thanksgiving early. I'm kinda excited. I'm also hoping to go to the Capitol Arts & Crafts Fair this weekend.