mynewplace

I am trying my damnedest to take this in the spirit in which it was intended. This man doesn't know me, doesn't know how I live my life, has no idea that I've lost 15 pounds since October. He has seen only photos of me. And at one time praised them to the skies. Apparently, allowing him another peek at those pictures last night gave him much food for thought:

The guy: You are my friend and as my friend whom I care for dearly, I think I should tell you that it would good for your health for you to lose some weight.
It can cause you all kinds of health problems.
including diabetes
which is very bad disease.
I want to see you live to be 60.
so there..
I got it off my chest.
probably none of my business.
also
probably contributes to your back pain.

Me: everyone is entitled to their opinion

The guy: sorry I made you mad
If I didn't care about you, I wouldn't say anything.

Me: not mad really. just a bit surprised that you'd say something like that. and disappointed that you feel you need to tell me something that i probably already know.

The guy: I know you know it.
But
If this is a cup of cold water in the face
and it helps you.
that's what I want.
at the risk of losing your friendship

Me: are you really so foolish as to think that i do nothing about my weight?

The guy: I admit that I am foolish.
I want you to live to be 60.
at least.
you won't make it unless you get control of this health issue.

Me: but you have no idea the things i do every day in order to deal with this weight problem. are you assuming that i sit on my ass and eat candy or something?

The guy: I have made no assumptions at all.

Me: every word that you're saying is full of presumption that i am currently doing nothing about it.

The guy: okay
as your friend, I support you.
you have far too much to offer the world
to have your life cut short

Me: the people in my family live long lives. the only chances of mine being cut short are by some sort of accident or by this deviling depression.

The guy: this situation could be contributing to your depression and to your back pain.

Me: and what would be the reason for the depression and the back pain in high school then? or college? when i was 20 pounds overweight?

The guy: It appears that you have thought this through thoroughly.
I cannot add anything.

Me: i live with it every day. i didn't want to back you into a corner with my response, but i felt no choice, as i was feeling backed into a corner by your comments.

The guy: The last thing I will do to anyone is constrain them.
in any way.
or attempt to constrain someone.
I honor your freewill and autonomy.
unconditionally.

Me: you must be feeling quite the dichotomy, being attracted and then repulsed by the very same body

The guy: nevertheless... I remain objective.
I want what is best for you.

Me: i think perhaps you need to rethink your opinions about what is best for someone else. why would i do anything to improve the health of a body i despise? far better to learn to love it as it is, and perhaps thereby want to treat it better.

The guy: your soul (the essence of you, the real you) lives inside your body. your soul is infinitely beautiful.. if you love your soul and spirit (as I do) you will want to sustain your essence in a healthy house.
I need to go.
take care.

Honest to God. I am putting every effort into being reasonable.