Thursday

[mynewplace]

I keep telling myself I need to get back to reality.  Fantasy world is staying all weekend at Brent's house, doing absolutely nothing but eating, t.v.ing, and sleeping, ignoring my own home and chores.  It's got to stop, this is ridiculous. It would be different if we were building a life together, but he's determined to kill the only part of himself that is capable of loving me.  And I need to be loved. At least I think that's what I need - it's hard to say you need something you've never had before. But I'm pretty certain, based on the love of other people in my life, that love is what I need. I guess I probably ought to say this to him before the weekend. There aren't many "right" times to say this sort of thing. And I'm not certain that it's necessary to end things altogether.  I guess that's where it will go, though, because he's not going to stop trying to kill his heart, certainly not for my sake.

Comments

Useless advice, delivered because I care...

[popfiend.livejournal.com]

And I need to be loved. At least I think that's what I need - it's hard to say you need something you've never had before. But I'm pretty certain, based on the love of other people in my life, that love is what I need.

We all need that.

You are and have been feeling that absence for a while, and it's shown in your posts. But you have been hoping that things would change.

I'll ask you a question...do you think things are going to change in a way that's going to get you what you need? If not, then you'll have to redefine what you want from him or move on from him to somewhere where you'll get it.

I think you already know the answer, but you're afraid to act on it, because you think you're giving up a shot at what you're looking for. But I think that what you're doing is preventing yourself from searching/finding what you need.

I could be wrong, but I don't think so.

We don't know each other well, but I know enough to know that you are more than deserving of that thing you seek.

But then again...I could just be an idiot.

*HUG*

You need to vent or talk, you got my email and my IM is on my profile.