Ooooops

deadclownsundae got all sentimental on my friends page. Dammit Jeremy! I had my shell all built back up and everything.

NO CRYING TODAY!

 

well, no MORE crying today. DAMMIT!

Today

This has been a day full of cris-crossing tensions. It's been a good day, overall. Brent and I have been bantering back and forth for several days now, culminating in a satisfying exchange crowned by his anonymous comments on some pictures in my other journal. his comment, but not a direct link to the pics 

It seems innocuous enough, I know, but you have to understand my thought process. He hasn't seen ANY of the new pics, and I've not even hinted that they exist, or that I will show them to him. For him to willingly look at them is one thing. To COMMENT? Even anonymously? It's a reassurance that he and I are becoming better friends, as I suspected. And if he gets sucked in to my tempestuous teapot one more time? So be it, according to my own will.

I'm feeling a pull again, but its multi-directional right now. As if I'm drawing several things toward me at varying speeds, and with them pulling in a strength that I anticipate will burst out of me like a beam of light. Almost like taking a deep breath before you blow out candles. The outflow might be concentrated and directed toward a certain point. Or it might just explode like a Roman Candle. I don't know what's coming, but SOMETHING is coming.

This power is a good thing. I'm going to the new circle tonight at Holly's house. There's an anticipation inside me that doesn't completely belong to me. Something in me is looking forward to this meeting tonight, as if it knows that there will be an opportunity for it to manifest itself there. I'm going to learn a lot tonight. And aside from that something inside, I am looking forward to the meeting, too.

EDIT: Oh, and Rae? I'm getting hits on both journals from India again. There was one time, right after I got my computer fixed, that I thought I saw an indication that Josh was online, on one of his old ID's. But he's still not speaking to me.