(no subject)

I've been hit - and it's wormed it's way into my yahoo group. Stupid worm.  

Yahoo, world's most popular e-mail, hit by worm

Reuters - Tue Jun 13, 1:50 AM ET

LAS VEGAS - Yahoo Inc., the world's largest provider of e-mail services, said on Monday that a software virus aimed at Yahoo Mail users had infected "a very small fraction" of its base of more than 200 million accounts. The e-mail virus, or worm, has been dubbed Yamanner and landed in Yahoo mailboxes bearing the headline "New Graphic Site." 

In other news, I'm restless. I hate it when I'm working so fast that I'm done before everybody else, and so everybody else is busy and I'm not. 

I feel like I'm back in grade school, and have my work sheet done, but can't get up to go play. *stomp*

And yes, as a matter of fact, I DO stomp my foot on occasion. It's cute. So there. I'm gonna go home, and run my sweeper. And do some more laundry. And run around half naked. Cause you know what? I CAN. So there. Hope I can maintain this energy level and not crash at the sight of my bed. Mmmm, green sheets, so inviting..... 

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

What made me cry today

I'm so sick of being propositioned. I'm sick of men who assume that I am willing to meet them for sex, without them expressing even the slightest interest in getting to know me. 

I'm having real trouble with feeling this way, because last year at this time, it was precisely what I wanted. I hadn't had sex in over seven years, and I needed to fuck. A LOT. I still need to fuck a lot, I'm operating on a real deficit, but I've closed out my Swinger profile, and I THOUGHT I had reworded all my other profiles to indicate that I wasn't some kind of a two-bit whore. Another reason I'm having trouble with this feeling is in the back of my mind, I'm convinced that I am still 'whoring myself out' with Roy and Brent. The only saving grace for either of them is the fact that they have both made real effort to get to know me before having sex with me. But neither of them wants anything near a normal relationship, and that's all my heart cries out for. 

I'm so beaten down and bruised of heart. I don't LIKE being so goddamned wishy-washy. But I have to take what I can get, because otherwise I've got NOTHING. And I've had that 'nothing' for too long - it ate away at my spirit, and sometimes it seems like there's not much left. I am truly a phoenix, in this respect. I've suffered destruction, soul-crushing rejection and disappointment, so very many times in the last 20 years. Yet every morning I wake up with hope in my heart, that today will be better, or different. Maybe this will be the day when I'll meet that someone who will love me. Maybe this will be the day when someone will recognize me and covet me and hide me away.

I'm so tired of rebirth.