mynewplace

People do such kind things. I almost refrained from mentioning the shift in my account because I was afraid someone would take it as a nudge and pay me up for a few more months. Thank you to whomever felt the urge to do so. I am grateful, and once again humbled at the kindness of my friends list.

I made the coffee mug chocolate cake last night. Scarlett and I ate it, and were only semi-impressed. It turned out a bit rubbery, which is to be expected when making flour-based dishes in the microwave. It was also a bit dry, which might have been alleviated by more milk or oil, I'm not sure which. Once it was turned out of the mug, it was dimpled and had a cave in the center that would have been tasty filled with chocolate syrup, icing, or as Scarlett suggested, flavored cream cheese. I'm raising her right, I tell you whut!

Have you ever had your sternum crack or pop? Mine did this morning, it's been a while. It was a bit of relief.

Leftover baked beans for lunch today. Look out world! I'm runnin' on nitrogen!

You may want to click on the picture to get the full effect of the distance between Institute (yes, that's a town)
and the road to my house in Charleston.

The Bayer Plant in Institute, WV had a severe explosion last night at about 10:30.

My uncle retired from this plant. I can't remember this plant ever having such a severe incident.

There are photos here.

The plant is "about 12 miles west of downtown Charleston" I felt the blast, and it shook
my apartment building. One man has died (I didn't know him) and one man was
injured so severely they airlifted him to a burn center out of state.

It's a sobering event that has been obscured by the conventions, vice president nominations
"Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, the so-called "hockey mom" credited with reforms
of her tiny, out-of-the-way state. (Alaska? TINY? PLEASE!!) Hilary Duff's dad,
andby David Duchovny's sex addiction.

Well, we are West Virginia. Sometimes we just don't qualify for headlines,
unless Chad Pennington leaves the Jets (J-E-T-S, JETS JETS JETS!)
for the Miami Dolphins.

Dammit - I can't get back into the last post to edit it.

nsingmanfigured it out, it's Steve Cauthen - or as I will always know him Stevie Cauthen - best known as the youngest Jockey to ever win the Triple Crown, riding Affirmed in 1978. Also the LAST jockey to ever win the Triple Crown. He owns a farm and training facility known as Dreamfields in his hometown of Verona, Kentucky. I was so fascinated with him when he won the Triple Crown - he wasn't much older than me and for many years he figured prominently in my girlish fantasies.

smiteboygot the other post - Boris Becker.

GREAT LEGS! At seconds 1:04 thru 1:06 you get to see that first victory dance. As I mentioned, I watched it with my best friend, who was a huge tennis fan. I'd never cared for it much, but I followed Boris. Who wouldn't? He was sunshiny-looking.

Before I go any further - here's a Happy Birthday shoutout to

warrior_priest. What a great birthday Kel, to spend it back in your hometown after all this time!

It was 14 years ago today that the world watched the white Bronco crawl down the freeway. Hard to believe so much time has passed. I remember listening to the O.J. verdict sitting in my car after a shift at the phone company. I think it was my last day of work there. That sparks some very bittersweet memories. Three months later, Scarlett was conceived.

It's going to be a beautiful day here today!! Mid to upper seventies, despite the glaring sunlight. Those temperatures always make me happy. I'm cooking up a new idea for the grill - I'm going to try it out tonight. I have a brand new cute little mini-grill that I'm going to take to Brent's house. I'm thinking if I cook the chicken on low heat in a skillet with lots of liquid it will steam and stay nice and moist, then throw it on the grill to finish it off - get those black marks and that yummy charcoal taste without drying it out. I hope it works.

I took Scarlett to Junior Conservation Camp last night. It's at a very nice Conference Center in the woods about 45 minutes from here. I KNOW she's going to have a fabulous time, and I saw one of my closest co-workers there. I didn't know she was going to be a leader at the camp, but it makes good sense. She loves kids, and has a soft spot for Scarlett so I have absolutely NO worries, because I know Karen will look after her. Can't wait to hear about it when she gets home.

I am so tired of talking about pain. Physical pain, that causes any joint and muscle to hurt when it's used, causes my knees to seize up if I sit too long, prohibits long periods of standing, makes me ache and bitch and run a fever.

But when pain is all you can think about, it becomes all you can talk about as well. I grow quite silent when I feel like this - the way I do today. No rain threatening, but it's cold enough in this building to make me hurt. The back of my thighs, the knuckles closest to my hands, the outside of my broken foot. If I were to get up and go to the rest room, the knees would set in, along with the ankles, and lets not forget those two scratches between my toes where my cats have freaked out while rubbing against my leg.

Sugar helps a little. I guess I'd better find a bit of Excedrin as well. I hate this, because I can't seem to be happy, and the ache is the primary reason that nothing pleases me. Brent hates to see me unhappy, which I find remarkably endearing, but he doesn't have time to lay down beside me and hold me for about two days while his body heat allows me to come back to myself. That's okay, I don't have time either.

It's supposed to be almost 80 degrees today, but I need a blanket and a hot toddy.

I hate having no INTERNETS!!!!!

I have gone through 240 posts this morning, just TRYING to catch up!

This is insane. I wish I had money to get internets. Or at least a wireless thingymabob.

Weekend, good. Spent Friday night alone, and most of Saturday. VERY GOOD.

Today - nearly cried at idea of getting up and going to work. Asked out loud while turning off alarm "Why? Why do I hate this so? What am I going to do?"

I am going to do nothing. I dreamed last night that my landlord came by and told me to move out by February 1 because he had someone willing to pay the full rent. I reminded him he had to give me 10 days, and he did so. (How generous.) Didn't really happen of course. I just want to move out so bad I'm looking for any excuse. I also have an overwhelming dread of EVER asking ANYONE to help me move. NEVER. AGAIN.

I can't think about that now. I'll think about that some tomorrow.

Too fucking hilarious. Courtesy of Icanhascheezburger.com

Joined a new community

invisiblyill That's invisibly ill, for people with illnesses that aren't readily obvious. There's a lot of coping required of people who have problems that aren't visible to the general public. Not to mention the coping required to deal with each of the illnesses.  Strange how many people have multiple problems, sometimes one brought on by another. You can learn a lot from LJ.

In other news, there is no news. Still trying to get the same stack of stuff off my desk that's been here for over a week. Why, you ask? Because I can't find a shit to give and only do something to one or two pieces of stuff before I go back to spider, or back to LJ, or back to yahoo.

And no, I have no comment about Heath Ledger, except it's a shame to see another young star gone.  I think enough has been said by others.

Yet another weekend gone by sans internet, sans cable, oh how I miss cable. Fairly good weekend, stayed naked most of Saturday. Tied Brent up. heh heh heh

Had a great time at Courtneys for brunch. LOTS of great food. LOTS of great conversation with such interesting people. Lots of admiring just how pretty Beth is. I should have said something about it.

No staff meeting tomorrow, has been cancelled due to sick boss. I'm glad.

Probably no dance classes this week, Scarlett's room is still a mess and I'm going to try and help her finish it up. We both need lots of reorganization. Time to set an example.

Brent needs lots of motivation and some goals. Reachable goals, steps toward larger achievements. He doesn't take small steps, but he is paralyzed by the idea of the leaps and bounds he wants to make. I wish I could get him to start thinking in smaller terms! This is driving me fucking nuts.

Holly sent some fabulous poetry, by many authors I've never read before. (I HAVE read Dorothy Parker, and love the fact that she can be caustic and still rhyme. What a witty woman.) I'm going to copy a couple here that particularly spoke to me and felt familiar. I find myself within many of these lines.

So much pain. So much of society has disregard for true women in favor of those who mistreat their bodies to fit in.

( Marge Piercy poetry behind this cut )

And then more, by Holly's handsome Mark Strand:

( Mark Strand )

I wish my man were on my plane - I wish we could walk together through these last years satisfied and content, and occasionally blissfully happy.

When I open a page to post here, why do I have to reposition my cursor THREE FUCKING TIMES in order to type in the subject line?

I have a headache. I am eating Twizzlers. I am going to do work here in a minute. I gotta go to the lav. I missed Leigh's birthday party last night, and instead had a screaming match with my daughter. I won.

There are a million things going on this weekend and none of them are matching up with my desire for Scarlett to finish her room. siiiiiiiiiiiigh

I don't like Hilary Clinton. There. I said it. I am not interested in discussing politics, I just don't like her. I'm sorry.

Moving right along.

I DO, on the other hand, like THIS news article. I love this woman. And if my daughter ever defies me in such a manner I pray I will be this strong. I haven't been this strong yet, but I'm working on it. I have done some things that seem to Scarlett to be just as cruel and unreasonable. But nothing this bad. Taking the Nintendo DS back instead of giving it to her for Christmas doesn't count because 1) she didn't know about it, and 2) it wasn't taken back for bad behavior, it was taken back because I couldn't afford it. She speaks so wistfully about the gifts her friends received for Christmas, all their electronic toys and iPods and phones and so forth, and it makes me sad for her. I'm truly sorry that I can't afford those things for her. But I'm just as sorry that she HAS a PS2 and can't use it at our house because of her behavior and her grades. She is sweet as sugar most the time, but I know that part of the reason she is able to maintain good behavior is because she DOESN'T have the PS2 at home.

The rest of my life today is the same old shit. My mind is filled with wishes for things like a home and some order to my life and I don't even want to say "a husband" because I feel like an idiot still wanting that when my main problem is my lack of patience.

So rather than think about those "same old shit" things, I'm going to quit writing and go to the loo. Ciao.

The temperature was 74 degrees when I went out for lunch. I hate spring in January. It confuses the forsythia. I think I made this same complaint last winter. Or the winter before. West Virginia is BAD about teasing its forsythia into bud before slamming with the big freeze.

I have a hickey on my right thigh. What I have on my inner LEFT thigh can not be called a hickey. Not even a bite mark suffices. I think the word is "hematoma". The size of a goose egg, and the color of blueberry juice. NOT pretty. Ahh, the price I pay for having creamy thighs.

I am in ~~denial~~ De Nile. I am doing the backstroke, because my boobs are bouyant. Care to join me?

BOO!

I'm alive. I don't have any faith that I will be able to say all I want in the 20 minutes left here at the office. I haven't typed in so long that my error ratio has been HORRENDOUS today. My hands are going to sleep all the time, this year might be the year of carpal tunnel, much as last year was the year of blood pressure.

Still internet-less at home, will be for at least another payday or two. Don't care, except that I MISS YOU PEOPLE! OMG I miss you so much! I've gone to several journals to catch up, but haven't hit everyone yet. I will do better next week because my boss will be out of town four days.

I recieved a stunning tennis bracelet with a heart shaped charm on the latch for Christmas from Brent. The charm has a tiny ruby set in it, and I love it very muchly. I know I'd implied I was expecting jewelry of another sort. But he is not ready for that. I am quite confused right now, I might not be ready either. Time will tell.

I have a new cat at my house. She doesn't have a name yet, won't answer to ANYthing, and is a bossy little bitch. I think I'm going to call her Goldie, she has wonderful gold highlights in her fur. She is marked like a bobcat or some sort of wild cat. And she's pregnant. Should drop her kitten-load in a week or so. That's another wait and see situation - Leigh says she has home for at least 3 kittens (I think) and I'm sure we won't have trouble placing any of them. However, I can't keep 3 adult cats. So there will be some home-finding later, probably in March or so.

I've drawn a blank. I'm so overwhelmed with information, and so aggravated that my fingers are numb, that I can't think of anything else left to say. So I will return to reading your journals and trying to catch up on my email. I had 138 emails in my Yahoo account this afternoon, and 104 at work. I love being missed!!

Today is my last day at work for the rest of the year. With thanks to our capricious governor, I will only use three days of annual leave and I'll have 11 days from work day to work day.

The bad part of this: today will likely be my last day online until I return to work. My cable and internet is off at the house and I don't know that I'll be able to afford turning it back on until after I get paid on the 28th. Maybe not even then. I've got one or two more Christmas presents to buy and then I'm done. I'm looking forward to dinner with Brent and his mother's family tomorrow. I am starting to relax as the season is winding down, once the gifts are purchased the rest is a breeze. I'll be wrapping this weekend, and I enjoy doing that.

Christmas cards are going out, and a I have a few more books to send. The last gift I ordered Brent online has not yet arrived, which is frustrating. I also have to remind myself to send in my PBS pledge so I can get the gift from THAT, possibly in time for Valentine's Day.

Suzi has been the surprise Christmas tree bandit. She's pulled off two ornaments so far but she is content to bat them around on the carpet so nothing's broken. Scarlett broke four of them just putting them on. A good lesson for her in being careful. Mitzi - whom I worried about - has only taken one. However, she showed a lot of brain power in that abscondment and ended up with a broken toy. Little smartie paws pulled the ornament off the tree, carried it DIRECTLY to the entry way and dropped it there by the door. The floor there is linoleum and thus toys make more noise when they are batted about. She was surprised when the ball shattered on contact! Looking back it's funny - that night it was just one more glass mess to clean up. siiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

So happy ChrisKwannukahYule to each and every one of you. I'll miss you all! Those of you with my phone number had BETTER call me at some point, dangit. And if I get anything earth-shattering for Christmas, I'll FIND a computer and post about it. I swear.

(This entry accompanied by the sound of fingers tapping on my desk)

I've been waiting for this to happen. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because a few months ago I heard that while accompanying her bizarre sister Britney, Jamie Lynn Spears used some filthy language with a reporter/papparazi. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the pre-teen scene, Jamie Lynn is the GOOD Spears who appears on Nickelodeon in a series called "Zoey 101". She is Zoey. She is adored. She portrays a 14 or so year old girl, who is kind and clever and popular. (blahblahblah, yanno?) So the language said to me "Ehh, she's gonna be trouble one day." Similar to Lindsey Lohan, or Britney herself.

Dammit. Jamie's pregnant. She's sixteen, living with a 19 year old boyfriend (or rather he's living with HER since she brings in the bucks) and preggers. They announced it on Bob and Tom this morning, decrying it with "Where are the parents??" Well duh! They're trying to navigate the shark-infested waters surrounding their grandchildren!! Who has time for a fairly well-behaved 16 year old girl who should be learning how NOT to act from her big sister?

Scarlett of course heard it, and said "What what what?? How did THAT happen????"

To which I responded "Sex, honey. She's having sex."

siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh

I am counting on her personal experience as a child born out of wedlock to prevent her from having sex too early. I KNOW I need to do more that that. siiiiiiiiiiiigh again

We put up the tree last night. Not finished, but at least started and moved furniture around. Cats aren't interested enough to climb it, are merely batting at ornaments so far. SO FAR.

Cable (and thus intranets) is off. I suspected it was coming. Just didn't know when. Eh, doesn't matter. She'll be gone by Friday, and I might get it taken care of next week. Might not. I miss my intranets, but such is life, yes? I have gifts to buy, and groceries. So in exchange, no cable. I can live with that.

I has a cold.

I think Scarlett gave it to me.

I stayed home from work today and have felt progressively worse as the day has passed. I kept Scarlett home too primarily because she's had a sore throat and yucky nose, and needed Vicks salve on her chest last night in order to sleep. Plus I couldn't bring myself to put forth the effort required to get her to school.

This means no nookie this weekend, and likely no sight of my favorite man. He wears his tissue boxes on his feet, thankewverrahmuch. Come in with the milk come in with the milk come in with the milk come in with the milk.*

So anyway. I haven't had much to say lately, and got a much needed nudge from Ruthie last night. I am going through much of the same ol' same ol' frustrations and bitches and frankly I'm tired of writing about them. I have a giant zit below my nose. I am utterly random and quite content in that mentality. I want cake.

I am not depressed, although well.....I might be. Borderline or something. Feels more like just tired of the shit. I get positively dreamy-eyed when I see a house, which is followed by getting slightly despondent when I think of the paperwork and effort involved and the difficulty I will have finding a suitable place within the parameters of the mortgage program - the only one that is interested in me. Right now I'm too busy trying to pay for Christmas and the roof over my head, my heat and my intranets. So house must take a back seat. Possibly until after the first of the year.

I'm getting a surprise this Christmas. First surprise I've received in a long time. I'm nervous.

And that's all I'm gonna say about that.

"a-choo"

*if you get this reference, you get a cookie.

Ow.

Went trick or treating with

kokopelleighand crew last night. Five adults and six children, only one of whom stayed with us, and that was only because he needed to be carried most the way. We had a great time, and got mondo mounds of candy. I learned after we dropped her off that Scarlett's little friend was not comfortable being separated from the adults most of the time. Heck, we couldn't keep up with those five! Poor Zoe. She also heard me say "fuck" last night. Her parents don't use those types of words. I apologized of course but I know it kinda made her feel weird.

So this morning I'm suffering. My left knee and right hip are bitching like mad, and it hurts so much it makes me say "Wow! That really HURTS!" when I walk. Not in tears at this point, just amazed. I have no Lortab with me, so it will be Excedrin here at work and likely Lortab at home tonight. siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh I don't like taking it frequently, some of this is rebound pain from taking one last night. However, I would not have been able to walk at a steady pace for almost two full hours last night without taking one. I'm just paying the piper now. toot toot

I need to get me a drink and my Excedrin before lunch. So I'll quit for now and possibly write more later. I hope I get some work done today.

And I have a smile on my face, despite my various frustrations.

I shopped myself SILLY Saturday! Then dragged Leigh's ass out and shopped her ass silly too! She got some awesome Fenton that I'd forgot about, and I am now blue with envy. Because the glass is blue, and I love it. She will put it to great use I'm thinking.

I GOT some blue glass stuff too - and this very cool huge goblet that would look great with a betta in it. However, I have this thing about not keeping a fish in the house with naughty cats, and also a thing about fish deserving more room than a glass bowl can give them. So I'll do something else with it. I can't WAIT to get back to my home and break out all my treasures.

Not the least of which is a new set of Pfaltzgraff - a gift from Leigh that I am utterly underserving and insanely crazy about. She is the most awesome friend. I'm kinda crazy about her too. Shhh, don't tell anybody.

And that man of mine.

( cut for sex )

I will be memeing later this morning, when all my requests are in.

The air conditioning repairman is supposed to call this afternoon to come and replace my unit. I hope it really happens. I miss my home.

Wow. Did I REALLY have nothing to say yesterday? Apparently so. I got Scarlett to school, I worked, and I picked her up. I prayed she would want to skip dance again, and she did. I was glad. The stress over all this commuting and finding clothes and worrying about the cats and I can't afford gas and OMG now what has absolutely done me in. NOTHING exhausts me like stress. So I borrowed $10 off Nancy to get home, we picked up some more clothes and off we went. Last night was fair, this morning was fair-ish. I was paid today so money woes are over. My landlord called last night, he "can't afford $1500 for a new unit" poor thing, so he's going to put a used air conditioning unit in my apartment. He said he'd try to get it installed on Saturday so I wouldn't miss work and I said NO. I'd rather miss work and get it Friday, because I have PLANS Saturday. So naturally he didn't call me back to confirm. And I'm at work instead of waiting for a repair man at my apartment. At least its nice and cool today. SO nice and cool.

I wanna go home.

Saw the 9/11 memorial on the boulevard Wednesday with Brent. We took Courtney but when we were told the line was closed, she took off down Capitol Street. Brent and I moseyed around and signed our names on the I-beam, but didn't get to see the display video. That was basically what we wanted to do anyway - sign the beam.

Got a cool new layout from the beta testing. I can't see it much, only when I check my friends page or my own page. When I'm typing entries, etc., its that same old blue crap. I made me a couple new icons to go with the layout. I should do another gratuitous icon post. ha All my brilliance are belong to me!

BIG yard sale at the Kanawha Mall tomorrow! WHOO HOO! Scarlett and I love those. I think I'm gonna go do some work now. Ciao bebbehs.

And a TMI Tuesday meme caught my attention:

1. Who did you think you would marry in elementary school?
Mike Grimm. He was my dream man.

2. Which muppet is your favorite? Why?
Kermie. He's the great all-around guy.

3. Which politician would you most like to screw? [For pleasure or revenge]
Bill Clinton. For pleasure.

4. How did you first find the g-spot?
I experienced it without knowing precisely what it was from the beginning of sex, at age 15. I'm not sure when I realized what it was.

5. What is the best costume you've ever worn?
Right after I had my breast reduction I dressed up as a can-can girl for Halloween. I didn't need a bra for the costume and it was a real thrill!

Otherwise - my extra icons subscription has expired - but that's okay. I don't really mind, I earn some every once in a while, and I've saved all the ones I deleted. I'll probably upgrade again sometime in the future.

No air conditioning yet, as far as I know. And no communication from my landlord, which isn't surprising. I too avoid making phone calls when I know the person answering will be a bitch. I am keeping track of my gas purchases, mileage, and the $16.6666 I pay for every day's rent. If he starts trying to charge me full price again "because the mold has been fixed" I will raise SO MUCH HELL. Brent wants me to look for another apartment. I want to as well, but good lord. It was so damned hard this summer I finally gave up. There's virtually no place that will allow pets any more. And I still want to stay within Scarlett's school district, an issue which Brent doesn't fully understand.

The cat's are at mom's today. They've been hidden under various furniture since we arrived, coming out when they see me, and clinging to my legs. They glance up warily at the ceiling if a fan is on. Poor nervous little things. Suzi is biting Mitzi's head off if she comes near, so they don't even have each other for comfort. I need to call about them.

I also need to do some work. Dammit.

I thought about just editing that last post, but decided against it. This one will be much more upbeat.

I'm 42 years old and have just made my first deviled eggs. They are delicious, of course. I think one of the secrets to my cooking skills (which are mad, yo) is that I have been watching and learning all my life. I have always read cook books, collected them, copied recipes, tried them with my own instincts, and ALWAYS asked "How did you do that?" "What's in that?" etc.

Thus, I have known how to make deviled eggs for several years. I've never done so because I only semi-like them, I have no egg plate, and I HATE the work of boiling eggs, etc. My mom boiled a BUNCH of eggs for Scarlett earlier this week, so I just used six of those. I already knew Brent and I like dill pickles better than any other, and he likes things with a minimum of salt and little or no vinegar. (I know. Dill pickles? No vinegar? Howso? But anyway) I DID have some trouble cutting up the baby pickles, but that just convinced me that NEXT TIME I see one of those chopper thingys, I'm gonna get it. They're so cheap. And I knew to put the stuffing in a baggie in order to get the stuffing in the eggs best. Just all kinna tricks up my short sleeves.

OH. The other thing that's brought out the "cook" in me is Brent. He's SUCH a great person to cook for. He loves so many things, isn't nearly as picky as he says, and is grateful. Scarlett's unwilling to experiment, but Brent's great at it.

I joined a photo community, with contests every week. I am looking forward to it.

This made me so sad. I shall go and chop some onions to put in the freezer. Maybe that will help me not think about it.

Nothing is as satisfying as going back to bed when you put the kid on the school bus, and sleeping for TWO MORE HOURS. OMGsigh.

The exterminator will be here between ten and eleven, which means I need to get my t-shirt out of the dryer right NOW before he shows up while I'm in my underwear. My house is not clean enough to suit me, I would not normally allow someone in. But for this man? Anything.

He says the poison is in gel form, odorless, dripless, and will not harm pets or people. That a child would have to eat two tubes of the stuff to be hurt (killed? um..) but he was only going to use one tube in the entire house. So. I assume that means that if my cat-who-eats-everything-even-plastic-bags takes a taste she won't fall over with her paws crossed in front of her. I mean, I can keep her out of his way, but if it's gel, it might be gooey for a while. I'll discuss it with him further.

Now I go. Hope my shirt is dry. Hope it is not shrinked-ed.

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